


Every Thought and Deed

by RelarOfFire



Category: Kingkiller Chronicles - Patrick Rothfuss
Genre: Gen, I haven't written in m o n t h s, but i did this real quick, no i did not spell check, no i will not correct things you just have to live with it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-12
Updated: 2020-08-12
Packaged: 2021-03-06 02:47:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,649
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25856143
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RelarOfFire/pseuds/RelarOfFire
Summary: Kote died and gets into an argument with Tehlu and Encanis over where and what he gets to do in the afterlife.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 8





	Every Thought and Deed

Wings of fire and shadow… Iron and glass… Blood and stone. The wings of fire and shadow sparked a very old memory in him, one of when he had been a boy. Cold, hurt, and one of his many times of nearly fading from the living. He remembered the warmth they offered him then, feeling it again for only a moment before all the wings around him vanished as soon as they had appeared.

Opening his eyes and looking up, the Kingkiller laid eyes upon a winged entity that stood before him with a hammer in hand. To describe a god is to try and describe a billion views at once; very slow and nearly impossible for one person to do. If he had to guess, such a form was always changing or tailored to whoever looked upon such a being, so he slowed his tired mind to not bother with such. He had done so much already… He wanted to rest. Just rest.

Around said entity, birds of the wings he saw before fluttered around the being, seeming to form almost a council in front of him. It almost reminded him of his few years learning in a place that wasn’t anything he had really hoped it to be back then. 

“Son of Arliden,” The deep voice came from the winged individual before him, “You are weary and have lived a long life. One of struggle and misfortune, but not one without wickedness and evil actions of your own. Repent and allow us to guide you into a peaceful afterlife.”

Kote stood quietly, letting out a soft breath after a long and tense moment. “I had so many questions for you for so long. And here I am, standing before you proper after unfortunate circumstances; Tehlu.”

There was no reply, only a shifting in position and the light hefting of a waiting hammer.

“So, so many questions… From why to how, into trying to find your logic and reason, and even maybe bargaining with you just to have some solace in all that has happened and become since you came to be. The truth, the lies, the reasons… So many questions.” Kote continued, shaking his head and putting a hand to his face. Rubbing his forehead, he sighed sharply and glared at Tehlu, “You aren’t anything I expected.”

“Mortals cannot comprehend us, as is it is meant to be.”

“That’s not what I meant. Your stories are all about purging evil from the world and people, fighting and protecting those who need it most. But where were you?” His voice cracked, clenching his hands into fists as he raised his voice at the god. “Where were you when anyone needed you most?! The innocent, the weak, the poor, the hurt and wronged? Where have you been when people are murdered and kidnapped, abused and starved? Where are you when the cruel act, the greedy harm others, killers roam free and people throw around wars like toddlers throwing toys? _Where_ were you when anyone I have and even have not known needed you most, _you bastard_!?”

The birds around Tehlu fluttered more and seemed to silently debate on acting against the mortals shouting or let such continue.

“You have much hatred in your heart.” Tehlu said simply, wings beating lightly and adjusting to be more comfortable. “Cruelty and wickedness, though I can help you not have such burdening your soul.”

“How are we supposed to not have those things when we have to act on our own? You really expect mortals to not defend themselves against the ones _you_ are supposed to be punishing and removing?! Us acting in protection is what makes us wicked, is that what you’re trying to tell us?”

“No.”

“If I were a more patient man, I would ask you to explain and to give me some fucking reasons. But, I’m tired. I’ve suffered enough. I have gone through hell and back without your help or aid along the way. You have done and will do nothing, just as you always have for any of us. You’re nothing but an over glorified war hero who has had his story twisted so much you stand here, with your head up your ass, instead of a more kind and caring soul who would actually aid those in need!” 

The birds start changing form to act out against Kote, but Tehlu lifted his hammer and stopped them just as a hand was placed on Kote’s shoulder from behind.

Looking over his shoulder, he smacked the hand away and stepped to the side, “This is not me siding with you either, _Encanis_.” He snapped, “I have no want to be a demon nor to aid you in making others suffer. Disregarding Tehlu’s word doesn’t mean and shouldn’t damnation to be around you.”

Encanis chuckled, face of shadow and just as hard to describe as Tehlu. “No, not always. But, I can lead you–”

“Shut your mouth.” Kote interrupted, looking between the two. “I refuse to side or abide to either of you. You’re,” he pointed to Tehlu, “passive and refuse to act when you are said to help those in their greatest need. And you,” he pointed to Encanis, “Are just an actual bastard and I refuse to lay more chaos and suffering onto people because you are a sick and twisted man who enjoys such. So you can take your hammer and smash his _and_ your own damned teeth out for all I care.

“Then what do you plan to do, little bloodless man?” Encanis asked, words more like knives than before, mocking and patronizing. “There is little room for you to cheat either of us, or to lie. We see _all_ you have done and been. All you were, could have been, and everything in between. You’re stuck now. No where to go. No where to run.”

Kote clenched his jaw and took a slow breath to calm his anger, running a hand through his hair. 

“Repent,” Tehlu said sternly, pointing the hammer at him.

“or burn and join me in oblivion.” Encanis added, holding out a hand towards him.

They were all left in a quiet and tense silence, waiting and watching the mortal before them. One of many names, many stories, and many changes. To them, it was no time at all passing. But to Kote, it felt like eternity as he tried to muster up the right thoughts and the proper ideas. Trying to work past his tiredness to be as brilliant and stupid as he use to be to get out of a situation. It grew harder the longer he stood and thought, the heavier he felt, the more burning the intensity of each of their stares got. 

“Neither.” He finally said softly, smiling a little. 

“What?” Encanis asked, pulling his hand away a little and raising his shoulders. “What do you _mean_ neither?”

“I mean what I said. I’m not going to repent for my wickedness and hatred. When I gave to others was what I did, and I am going to own it. Some was justified, others not. Sometimes I was young and foolish, other times I was giving the justice that was supposed to be brought upon them. But, I won’t let that wickedness and hatred consume me and turn me into a monster. I won’t let it overtake me and allow me to harm those who don’t deserve it. I helped and aided those in need, I gave when I had nothing, and I learned from everything. If that doesn’t counteract me stepping in and delivering judgment onto those who acted wrong against me or those who were innocent, then I won’t repent. I’ve held the burden so long, I can hold it forever. And I can hold it forever without letting it twist me into something a vile as you. Either of you.You both make me sick.” He spat at his feet.

Encanis growled and huffed, “Stubborn bastard. There isn’t anything else for you, you know. It’s not like you can gain godhood.”

“Why not?”

“Wh– _Why not_? Ha! Oh, please tell me you’re joking! I can’t take this type of joke, I might keel over laughing so hard.”

“There is a tale of Tehlu where he fought in the creation wars and took up the mantle of an angel. What makes it that no one else possibly can?” Kote questioned simply. “I refuse both your logic and your ways, therefore I will find my own.”

“What aren’t you getting? Are you really that stupid?”

“Perhaps. You should know if I am or not, since you both are apparently all seeing.” Kote retorted almost mockingly. “You might be as stupid as I am, running for eight days through cities.”

Encanis seethed, but couldn’t act with Tehlu present.

Tehlu lowered the hammer and turned away. “Then there is nothing here for me to aid. If you will not accept my word and allow me to redeem you, you will be nothing. What happens to you is beyond he or I in knowledge. Such does not happen often. Perhaps you will be lucky and some holy fire will cleanse you of your wickedness and you will see the light once more.”

Encanis huffed and turned away as well, leaving without saying a word.

“One last thing, Son of Arliden.” Tehlu said, wings moving out of the way to allow his face to be seen by Kote.

Kote turned to him after he was sure Encanis had dissipated, looking up with exhaustion in his dully eyes. “If you are to tell me not to call upon you, I know. I don’t think I ever have, even in my greatest need. You weren’t ever there. You never were.”

Tehlu was silent for a moment, “Then go forward and suffer in silence, as you always have. As you always will, now.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading, hope you liked it. Like my tags said, lmao no I didn't spell check and no I didn't check for errors I am not that focused as of late.


End file.
